AlexisWith any endeavor in life you are excited about, you begin to immerse yourself in that endeavor, and it can even spark a passion you didn’t know existed. When you immerse yourself and you begin to soak up all there is to know about this new adventure, you begin to mature in your understanding and what it means to you. For me, I start picking up on certain nuances and seeing things from different angles and keener eyes. With this understanding, I begin to draw my own conclusions about a particular topic or belief, and over time my my choices begin to drift into something different. At a minimum a different perspective begins to form on any said subject. This is good though. People need to be constantly aware and constantly looking for ways to improve themselves and their situations. It helps us grow when don’t even realize we are.
Should I Stop Being A Nudist?
Good questions isn’t it? Nudism is about the freedom of body and spirit, a way to go beyond the bounds of what standard society thinks is normal, and embark on a path to be against the norm or create a new norm for people. A norm where judgement, expression, income class, and skin color don’t seem to matter. You can color yourself with tattoos, feel confident in the size of your body, large or small, and see people for who they really are without any hiding. It’s a great utopia that we all yearn for, we all need, and the hope that keeps us all going thinking one day things will get better for our life and our lifestyle. The question I have is how realistic is that?
There is not doubt the acceptance of your naked body and the naked bodies of others has a tremendous impact on our mental and physical health, and the benefits of shedding the clothes goes way beyond anything a study group can identify. Personally, the dramatic shift into a nudist lifestyle has been a godsend for me, and when my life was falling apart around me, it was the solace of my nakedness that brought me through that time, and my ability to lean on the community for that support and encouragement. I still get emails from people asking me how I am doing and how they can help. You all truly are wonderful and a family I have never really had. I am blessed.
Just Answer The Question!!
Okay, okay, okay. I guess there has been enough of a prologue to get into what the hell I am talking about. Over the course of several months I have been a bit distant from my blog and social media. I’ve made a few posts here and there, and I have tried to stay somewhat engaged, but there was just something deep down bothering me. Well, maybe bothering isn’t the right word, but there has been a number of things on my mind that led me to this question.
Nudism is tainted. Plain and simple. I feel that nudism is so tainted with bad connotations, horrible exposure, and an endless marketing from porn sites and news media, there will be almost zero chance the community will be able to overcome this type of view from those outside of our lifestyle. I’ve wrote on something similar to this before, and it’s nearly impossible to do a search on nudism, naturism, nudists, and naturists, and not find something related to porn, swingers, exhibitionists, and many other perversion of the title nudist. Do your own research and see. Nudism has become the face of young naked women frolicking through the woods just begging for men to come searching for them. To me, it’s turned into a sexual fantasy that people search for because they want be naked all the time for sexual purposes. How do we overcome that? No idea. To make things worse social media has banned major nudist voices for no apparent reason, but they will allow “nudist” porn to float all over their platforms.
I think this is a major reason why you don’t see people claiming the nudist lifestyle, and beating down the doors at resorts and clubs. If you say you’re a nudist, people immediately have a weird reaction. This may not be evident to you or I on the surface, but you’re immediately judged as having a weird kink, perversion, or some other abnormal sexual interest. I think more people live a somewhat naked lifestyle, but they are more private in their expression and don’t tell anyone. This group of people is the greatest opportunity to prevent the lifestyle from dying out.
A Safe Online Nudist Community Will Fix This
I 100% agree this would help. I’m all in, but how do you do it? On one hand you can create an online community and allow anyone to join, but then you work tirelessly trying to keep the sex addicts, porn bots, and predators away. It’s a full time job for many people, and even then you’re not guaranteed to keep everyone away. There’s no 100% fail safe. Take TrueNudist for example. I think it is a great platform with so many features, members, and a chance to get to know real nudists. The problem is you don’t have anyway to know who is legit and who is not. Sure, the “verified nudist” is a way, but I find that a bit weird and you sign over your rights to the photo. I’m not doing that. Additionally, the short time I was on there and visited the chat, I was bombarded with hundreds of male nudists wanting to get to know me, be my friend, see when we can meet up, etc. Not to mention the sign up process was something close to a dating site information harvest. Sorry, I don’t share personal information with anyone on the internet. Period.
What about an exclusive club? I think an exclusive club is a great idea and an excellent way to ensure only the most legitimate and trusted nudists are members. You reduce the risk and worry for porn bots, and maybe to some extent sex addicts, swingers, and predators, but who else do you eliminate too? The goal of nudism is to be an all inclusive community where everyone should feel welcomed. If you eliminate the ability for new people to easily join the community, then you are going to inevitably age out the “member” base and there will be no new blood to replace those who leave or age out of it. There is a thing as being too overprotective. For example, my ex father-in-law used to pick up troubled teens from the half-way house and take them to the church he was attending at the time. Some of the members were upset with him because he brought those kids to church. Their argument was they would be a bad influence on the kids of the church. He left the church because he knew those kids were right where they needed to be. A place to be loved and shown a set of morals to live by when they have never received any. I know it’s not the same thing, but the analogy still shows how our prejudice can surface.
What Am I Doing Now
I will continue to live and breath a clothes free, naked lifestyle, and I will continue to blog about my journey through this relatively new endeavor in my life. I want to talk about my experiences and how my nakedness has played a role in my decisions, health, and almost every aspect of my life. Going forward I’m not sure I will identify as a nudist, naturist, or any other identifying group. I’m just going to be naked, nude, and clothes free, and when asked about it I will say I see no need to be dressed all the time, especially when I am alone or in the company of others who are like minded.
I know my website is identified as a nudist website, so I am still thinking on what to do with it. I have purchased it for like 5 years, so it won’t be going anywhere and I won’t ever let it go back to the registrar. I will continue to own it for many years to come. However, I may purchase a domain name to be my new home on the internet, which will allow me to write, but without the identity of any group that could be misconstrued. I’m still deciding. Will that bring some unwanted attention? I’m not sure. I doubt it is no worse than what I have already experienced.
What are your thoughts? Am I crazy or seeing things too cynical?
Alexis
Alexis, I totally get what you’re saying. My own experience with nudist/naturist organizations these days is that almost everyone they now attract is male, except for a small number of females who’re in a good relationship with “real” naturist males. That’s undoubtably a consequence of the factors you’ve cited so clearly. Women, especially young women, are now very tuned in to the problem of unwanted sexual attention from males. Real naturists understand proper behavior, but too many men who’re attracted by the idea of social nudity yet have little actual experience with it don’t seem to have the correct understanding.
Is there a solution, and if so, what is it? My view is that the only solution is a robust network of local and regional naturist organizations. Large scale naturist organizations, at least in a country like the U. S., simply are NOT up to the task. What is possible in a small local organization is that naturists can explain naturism to open-minded others they know who TRUST them. Personal contacts, in other words. That’s simply NOT possible through organizations where communication is only online or via printed publications or news media.
The “gotcha” in this local approach is that most real naturists are terrified of coming out to others about their naturist beliefs. Why? Because of the terrible false image that now exists around the terms “nudism” and “naturism”. Turning this around is possible ONLY if individual naturists have the courage to explain the joy of naked living to people they know who trust their judgment. It’s necessary for non-naturists to learn that real naturists have a firm understanding and respect for the personal boundaries of everyone who participates in social nudity. Only those of us who have this understanding and respect can communicate that to others.
I think many others have come to the same conclusion, including major/minor organizations, and although they won’t admit it, they realize the task is so monumental that it will take up too much time and money to try and overcome. I think it comes down to the idea of lie in the shadows of a small niche community, and only formally acknowledge or allow in those who have a purist mindset. A large outreach is certainly needed, and I have seen some try to do this online. However, when you go through and read some of the comments on non-nudist websites, you see the internet trolls come out and claim “people will do anything for their moment of fame”, or “these people are so sick and perverted…no one wants to see your nasty nakedness”. I get it. I’m sure it’s exhausting to try and overcome the misrepresentation of what it truly means, and so the mindset ends up being “why even try” because the internet has already defeated any progress forward. I think in time you will slowly see the shrinking of the nudist community, and you will only have a few who are keeping it afloat. It’s unfortunate because there are so many good people who would help the community thrive.
The local option could bring many benefits and new people to the scene, but I do understand how many ar not willing to “put themselves out there” in order to do it. In today’s information age, it’s so easy to find out everything about anyone with just a little bit of information. What happens if someone takes your picture and then you see it on some porn or other site? Many are not willing to take that risk, so they live quietly in their homes with little to no social nudity activities. This is great except it does nothing to grow the community numbers, and eliminates the opportunity to make some new friends. So what do we do? No idea, but I know there are more naked people out there just waiting to be found.
The fear of one’s naked pictures being posted on porn sites is understandable. But in a local group, nearly everyone wants to protect everyone’s privacy. Almost all naturist parks and resorts don’t allow picture taking (without consent), but that’s very hard to enforce now that everyone has a cellphone. The largest problem of “exposure” is at clothing-optional beaches, and of course that’s even harder to control. So local groups, and gatherings in private homes, remain the safest options. This needs to be more widely realized.
I know but it takes a lot of courage and a huge leap of faith for some to make the first step. I’m happy for the ones who do and have the local groups to lean upon.
As far as I’m concerned, I can’t give up living naked. It has become something that is now part of me
I’ve only been nudist and naturist for 5 years and I’ve been living naked for 4, so maybe I don’t have much experience, but in my opinion the reason naturism is dying is that we don’t know what it is anymore. All values ​​have been taken away from him (healthy life, physical activity, unrefined foods, return to nature, natural medicines, etc.), once naturism was a natural activity, a philosophy of life, but today it is only about taking off your clothes. Not even I could give up nudity is impossible. But nudity alone cannot be the only value of naturism. What happened to the other values? The fight against consumerism, the importance of physical activity? etc.
Today alleged nudists or naturists go to spend money in modern facilities instead of nudity in nature, many of them smoke, drink and just take off their underwear to define themselves as naturists. But please … what are we complaining about?
Hi Alexis, I agree wholeheartedly with what you’re saying, and I don’t have any answers either.
I just wish there was a easy and true way to find other honest nudist and like minded people, and not have to jump thru so much false “traps”.
Enjoy your articles.
Keep in touch with us fellow nudist !
Thank you for your kind words. Many are trying to come up with an answer and many have failed. I hope progress can be made and a wide reaching solution can be found.
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Interesting post. Although I still identify as a nudist, I’m about ready to give up on social nudism. In 2016, after our kids had all moved out on their own, my wife and I moved to a residence with a private backyard, in-ground (seasonal) swimming pool, and (year-round) hot tub. Consequently, we don’t need to go anywhere to enjoy a nudist lifestyle. Then along comes COVID in 2020, and suddenly we’re both working from home. And somewhat to our surprise we discovered that we don’t much miss the company of other people. So why spend thousands of dollars to travel someplace just to be naked when we can do the same thing at home? I realize that we are more fortunate than most other people to have our own, private naturist garden. But I’m beginning to wonder whether home nudism will eventually become the predominant means of experiencing a clothing-free lifestyle.
This is amazing to read. I think you are living what most others dream of doing. I think it would be safe to say this is how most are experiencing the clothes free lifestyle right now. With all the work from home, and whole countries shutting down, people are realizing they don’t need a lot to enjoy life. I know my laundry bill has gone down since this fiasco started. I support anyone who takes on a clothes free lifestyle, regardless of where they do it. Hopefully, those who do it at home will still try to reach out to the online community to make new friends.
So well said and very relatable in many ways. There is certainly a level of frustration in trying to promote wholesome, non-sexual social nudity in today’s digital world. At the end of the day, we do our best to share our story in hope of inspiring others and debunking myths about the life philosophy of nudists or naturists. That said, we have also been extremely cognizant of the fact that at the end of the day our choice to participate in (and promote) non-sexual social nudity is one we make for ourselves. As you say, for the great mental and physical health benefits we personally receive — and hope we can encourage others to experience and also benefit from.
Try not to stress too much about what this *needs* to be, and simply continue to be you without any obligation to take anything further than that. We absolutely appreciate your contributions to this space, no matter the frequency of your posts. And in case you haven’t seen or heard of NaturistHub, a relatively new naturist social media that is invite-only (and free to use with no pretense or silly requirements), we would be happy to send you an invite to take a look around, if you are interested. Thanks again for all that you do, Alexis. Best wishes in 2022 and beyond!
Hi Alexis,
I think your conclusion you will just be you without labels is the correct conclusion. its not about quitting, its just about being. Promote what you believe in by doing, by example. What you wear , eat, love says more than all the talk.
This is very true. I’m not going to quit my naked practices or trying to love my body more. I prefer to maintain and promote my individualism, but still promote positive values toward a society of naked acceptance.
I understood that by reading your website, nice explorations BTW. To articulate what I mean further. I live in Canada where it is not illegal to be nude as long as your intention is not lude or to offend on purpose. This was ruled by our supreme court. Women in Canada can go top-free anywhere a man can. These things would not have happened in law if people had not stood up and secured these rights. I do my part every day to promote this state of being to the uninformed and live my truth without exception.
I think far more people can relate directly to what you’ve expressed here than you might think.
I had very similar experiences 10 years ago when I began to immerse myself into a more nude orientated lifestyle.
My objective at the time was to immerse myself in nature, detach myself from stress and it’s associated misery. I found that walking naked in the wilderness and skinny dipping were the perfect remedy.
I can’t see that anything has really changed over the past decade so far as nudist communities go. There are still many young people discovering how wonderful it is to be freed of clothes, and communing with nature. The same ambition to normalise what never should have been demonised still exists.
Perhaps the answer is just simple blogs like yours that express an honest truth for others to find. Perhaps an underlying tenant of life itself is finding the courage to live your uniqueness no matter how lonely or difficult that might be at times. I think those that are discerning and genuie will be rewarded and supported when they most need it.
If I’ve learnt anything over the last 10 years, it’s that endurance is the key.
Hi. I agree a lot with you on the ideas you put here: the web is plagued with sites the misuse terms like nudism to disguise their less acceptable (socially speaking) nature, and to lead the curious into their realms, in most cases to try to get some money out of them. On the other hand, there’s a problem that lies in the worldwideness (let’s suppose this word exists), I mean, to try to unify all the possible meanings people’s around the globe can give to a term (or set of terms) into one can be quite tricky (it’s not quite the same the German FKK than the British naturism than that of the US, or the relaxed latino/caribbean ways); and I think that those differences should be respected and shouldn’t be forced into one model, after all nudims/naturism is about all of us being the same as we celebrate the differences that makes us unique.
Another thing (I’ve said it many times before) is that I think that having a blocking, red-flagging, banning policy of those that come into “legitimate” nudist places (real or virtual) with the wrong mindset, turn our groups into gettos, set us appart as elitists or better-than-thou pretentious snobs, and a chance to meet real interested people (but misleaded) is lost, the opportunity to educate and open the gates to a terrific lifestyle for them (a lifesaving lifestyle as many state afterwards) could be lost. Furthermore, if we repeat ad nauseam the nudism has nothing to do with sex (but we accept we are sexual beings and have a sexuallity we know how to set aside from the nudist practice), then why can’t we accept that this or that person that is into (for some) questionable lifestyles choices, is as capable as us to put things in the right place and time, in the end all are different life/jobs choices and paths.
The label on our heads is another issue. Whenever a label is used, it sets a group (of whatever -things, people, ideas) appart from the rest (depending on the definition and conception of the words used as labels), useful for taxonomical purposes otherwise lead us into an us vs. them scenario I don’t like that much. Let’s accept that that over there dubbed himself nudist, that she likes to be called naturist, and the guys there prefer to use the clothes-free concept, whatever… I myself hate it when someone says “Ivan is a nudist…”, I rather say if needed that I’m comfortable in the nude/naked, or that if it’s possible (and not necessary at the time) I like not to wear anything -the same as for when someone ask me in the street about the reasons for me being barefoot (as usually I am).
This is a very important conversation for the community and I have an anecdote. I am the caretaker of a relaxation/meditation space that is rooted in Body Acceptance, gratitude, respect and trust. Members must be naked, guests suits are optional. The facility has a hot tub, cold tank and sauna, reflection room for meditation/massage/yoga or Tai Chi. To become a member you must be sponsored by a member after coming to the facility as a guest at least 10 times. All stewards of the space are volunteers, there is no staff on sight, it is $1 a day and runs on an extreme level of trust and integrity. no alcohol/drugs/sex or sexual comments allowed. conversation is to be reflecting kindness and compassion. While I and maybe three others identify as naturists/nudists most of the members do not. I think our model could be something that could work.
peace from within to all of you
Bootz, Thank you for your comment and insight. This sounds like a really good model to follow and I think one that some resorts and online communities have started to adopt. I think it is important to “vet” people before they join, but there is a right way and a wrong way to do so. I agree the invited friend method is probably one of the best ones to do. Also, I love the idea of the nude relaxation/meditation space which focuses on body acceptance. I don’t see many people identifying as a nudist/naturist, but I do see them becoming more comfortable in their skin and accepting of their beautiful bodies.
Personnaly, I think resorts are going to have to advertise the benefits of social nudism to the the general public. To increase their membership.Unfortunately that costs money, and most resorts work on a slim margin.Look at France and how they are generating more family participation. Education may generate interest in the lifestyle. We cannot do it individually.
David, I think you are correct in your view that education in advertisements can go a long way. I think there could be much ridicule from locals for running such an ad, but it will certainly get the word out. Could you imagine the audience if the nudist/naturist organizations pooled their money together and launched a Super Bowl or other massive sporting event ad? I’m sure there will be jokes made, but talk about the reach and getting the idea out there for people to think about.
Enjoyed your article, and have recently looked at similar issues myself. I have stopped using the term “naturist lifestyle” to describe how I live, and have started using the term “naturist philosophy”. I think the term lifestyle is percieved as having more of a sexualised overtone, and swingers often talk about joining in the lifestyle.
While I enjoy being naked at home most of the time, and my partner and I enjoy outdoor nudity when we can, I prefer to think that I live my life increasingly according to a naturist philosophy, which embraces a whole range of natural and environmental considerations, and not just nudity. While nudity plays an important role in my life, it is not the only part, and it does not define me.
The proliferation of sexualised nudity on social media has led me to retreat more into dedicated naturist sites like the Naturust Hub. Weeding out the inappropriate accounts of platforms like Twitter is a full-time effort, and sometimes i wonder if it is worth it.
I recently realised that I cant control the actions of others, and only have control of my own world. My partner and I live our lifves according to our rules, our philosophy, and we dont worry about the behaviour or actions of others.
So… I might call myself a nudie. Sometimes a “clothing optional.” Sometimes a “body positivist.” Sometimes nudist or naturist but NOT in the organized identity group sense. (I consider myself “free range.”) I don’t consider it a label or an identity. i consider it a description of something I enjoy. It is like saying I like l to collect stamps or I like to go camping or I like to watch anime but not making any of those things my identity. Enjoying nudity is just one of many things that goes into who I am. My identity is a complex thing and boiling it down to a particular trait is a bit dehumanizing.
The minute you put a common label on yourself all the popular conceptions of what the label entails are applied to you. You become trapped within the structure of what is now expected. (You can see how this happens in other areas of identity politics.) If you pronounce that you are a nudist as your identity and you don’t behave as a nudist is expected to behave, you may struggle within your social bubble or your organization or club or whatever. Outsiders who apply their own expectations may be surprised when you don’t act as they expect.
Porn, swingers, exhibitionists, and many other perversions of the title nudist.” are something we have to coexist with for the foreseeable future. They aren’t going away. The best one can do is to make one’s peace with it and just don’t share with those folks.
Nudies require thick skins. If you feel vulnerable, that’s where closets come in. Everyone has to judge for themself how much exposure to risk. The more exposure, the father out of the closet you move. But everyone is closeted to some degree as long as ordinary nudity is not socially acceptable. Until I can mow my lawn in the nude and experience no repercussions, I still have one foot in the closet.
OTOH, I am far more out of the closet than most nudists. Because of that, I have been called an exhibitionist by both nudists and textiles. Yet I have been called a prude by swingers and by certain gays. I figure that just proves I’m being authentic. If you can’t please everyone, you’ve got to please yourself.
I really like how you put this and it really puts things in perspective…at least for me and I’m sure others as well. I think many are either scared or have a misunderstanding as to what organized nudism really is. It’s this misunderstanding that lead the ignorant to group us into those of porn, swingers, exhibitionists, etc, and I do believe it will be with us for a long time.
I never thought about it but you are correct in when we identify a certain way we have expectations to uphold, and if you fall outside of those expectations then you risk becoming ostercized by those who are in your group. I’m sure that is why my blog has been the subject of debate/question. I don’t want to be held to anyones standards but my own, which is why I’ve been looking at rebranding. Maybe I don’t want to just talk about nudity, why you should do it, or why we are seen as weird. I think just being yourself as a regular person who enjoys their own nudity would go a long way in normalizing nudity. Maybe I’m too naive…
I too would like to mow my yard naked or work in my flower beds without anyone batting an eye. Like you, until that day comes I will keep a foot…or maybe even a leg in the closet. One day maybe.
Regarding TrueNudist.
This is co-owned by TrueSwingers, with details available across both sites.
There is also an issue with the moderators “and their friends” who tend to ban innocent users.
Even worse, they refuse to acknowledge any “requests for support”, especially if questioned about “banning” without any reason or ability to state your case. Or even identify “who or what was said” to cause the banning.
Yet they happily allow “hidden and false” profiles, some of which are their “friends”.
I had no idea they were this rude about support. I kinda thought the sites and folks behind it were a bit shady, but maybe they are just doing things to ensure they make a profit on the website. I can see how the allure is there to work and just turn a profit. It’s expensive and time consuming to run a site like that. I think it has potential to be a great site, but keeping it clean and moderated with proper support is challenging with a small crew. I suppose that’s why I didn’t stay long.
Hi There, Alexis,
I’ve read your article on giving up on nudism.
Maybe this can help You.
There’s a young Belgian couple that happened to encounter exactly the same problem as Yours.
There website is called “Naked wanderings”.
They created a genuine online platform called Naturist Hub. They keep the acces to their heb quite limited.
Maybe if You contact them You can come to a mutual understanding.
Greetings,
Withouck Michel
Withouck,
I appreciate you reading my blog and providing great feedback. I know of Nick and Lins and we have spoken a couple of times. They do a great deal for the nudist community and we are lucky to have such advocates. I have thought about this a lot over the last year, and I have no doubt Naturist Hub is a wonderful and safe place for nudist to meet. I had people offer to vouch for me and help me get an account, but I just had very little desire to pursue it. Part of it could be that I just don’t care that much for social media of any kind. Plus, I just don’t have the time to try and keep up with everything and what everyone is doing. Even here on my blog is a challenge for me to respond to comments and emails sent from followers. Some have just stopped reaching out because it takes too long for me to respond.
The good news is I have a trip planned this spring for myself and my boyfriend to visit a clothing optional resort in Jamaica. It’s been many years since I have been to a social nudist spot, and I am really looking forward to it. My hope is that it will reignite the spark I once had, and it will put a spark in my boyfriend to want to visit more clothing option/nudist resorts. Also, I would love to write about these places in my blog!